A Session for Late Comers (Ranjan)

You’re late.

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Is this the first time? Probably not.

Here’s an idea. Why don’t you write an essay on why being late is a bad thing? (source: custom-writing.org)

How to start:

Start with describing a situation when being on time is extremely important. Let it be a job interview, for instance. Tell about the consequences of being late in such situation. Can a person who is late for a job interview actually get a job?

How to develop your essay:

Now, you can discuss reasons for being late. So, why do some people tend to be late regularly? What excuses do they usually have? Are there some scientific explanations of this phenomenon? Give answers in your essay on being late.

How to finish:

Finally, you can discuss how to manage this problem. Introduce some basic principles of time management. Give your own recommendations in the essay on being late. Probably, you had a similar problem but you got rid of it.

What are you looking at me for? Chop, chop! Get started, you don’t have as much time to write as everyone else since you’re late.

Here are some other writing prompts for those who want to turn this into a story:

  1. You are late to an important meeting, and then when you come in, everyone gets up, points at you and starts laughing. You hang your head in shame because you realise you deserve it.
  2. You are late to your best friend’s wedding, where you are best man. While your best friend is giving a toast, he admonishes you quite severely about being late, and his wife nods on in approval. You spend your toast apologising for being late.
  3. You promised you’d take your dog for a walk, and then you’re late! Your dog snarls at you, and doesn’t love you anymore. You take him back to complain to your wife, only to realise she is planning to leave you for the dog. Oh, and she also starts snarling at you too.
  4. You are late to the first date you’ve had in years. Your date gets up, douses you in kerosene and sets you on fire, and the entire restaurant gives your date a standing ovation. The police turn up, only to let her off with a “light warning”.
  5. You are late to Write Club, the biggest crime of all, and so you are brought before a special court, reserved for prosecuting the worst kind of criminals. The public prosecutor has just walked up and is now giving a fiery speech on why you deserve the death penalty.
  6. You die from the burns on your date (prompt 4) or at the hangman (prompt 5) and so you now go to the gates of heaven. But you’re late again! So you’re banished to hell where you’ve forced to relive the kerosene scene (prompt 4) or the hanging (prompt 5) for eternity.

 

 

Useful tip: identify the kind of late person you are (source: TIME)

 

  1. The Infuriatingly Relaxed Colleague: The person who rolls into the meeting 10 minutes late, holding a coffee that they clearly could have forgone in order to be on time.
  2. The Manic Pixie Procrastinator: The person who shows up, breathless, their whimsical flowy skirt fluttering in their wake, thinking their lateness is adorable and bohemian.
  3. The Pre-Liar: The person who texts you “almost there!” when you are confident they have in fact just exited the shower.
  4. The Post-Liar: The person who arrives late and says “Oh my God, I’m so sorry, the subway was delayed!” when you live in a town without a subway.
  5. The Interruptor: The person who comes into the movie right as it’s starting, distracting you from the important opening scenes and/or literally crawling over you.
  6. The Hangry-Maker: The person who is so late that you say screw it and start eating brunch alone.
  7. The Genetic Latie: The person who blames their personality for why they’re always late.
  8. The Empty Chair: The person who shows up late to an event where you’re graciously saving them a seat. Everybody gives you the stink eye, but you’re not the monster here.
  9. The Oversharer: The person who always blames their lateness on their significant other. This typically involves an overly detailed story you’re then forced to listen to.
  10. The Harried Commuter: The person who blames public transit or traffic every time they’re late. (Sometimes, yes. But every time? No. Build in extra time.)
  11. The Overscheduler: The person who is late because they were doing some other fun thing right before and you know because they Instagrammed it. BUSTED.
  12. The Eleventh-Hour Overcompensator: The person who sends you a completely overdramatic paragraphs-long text explaining why they’re late. (For example: “OMG I’m gonna be late bcuz a UNICORN was crossing the street so OBVIOUSLY I had to follow it but then my foot hurt so I had to stop and see why my foot hurt and then RYAN GOSLING walked by but it was actually a homeless person LOL so yeah I’ll be there in 45 mins maybe!”)
  13. The Spatially Incompetent: The person who is always late because they just can’t seem to figure out how long it takes to get from their apartment to Point B, even though they’ve lived there for three years.
  14. The Denier: The person who walks in, hugs you hello and acts like their lateness just never happened.
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